When Someone You Love Won't Say "I Love You"


No, I do not have the answer for why some have trouble saying “I love you”, but I will tell you the phenomenon is real.

Growing up, my parents said “I love you so often I used the phrase generously as a child. Maturing, I realized the expression was special. Over time, I saved those three words for family, close friends, or people who generally meant a great deal to me.

I also realized some do not say “I love you” frequently, if ever. There are spouses, parents, friends, significant others, you name it, who do not (and will not) express their love in word form. They routinely show their love in actions, but remain tight-lipped.

I do not think it means the individual does not love, so much as it is a hurdle for some. A few reasons through research include: they were not taught as children how to say “I love you”, fear and feelings of vulnerability, some may not conceive the need for saying the phrase, etc.

Was motivated to share this after watching someone say, “I love you,” only to not have the words reciprocated, knowing very much the person not responding did love them. After questioning the situation, learned that person had only said “I love you” once or twice over the time period of many decades. This post is mainly to tell you if this is your experience, then you are not alone. And it is not you. It is them.

Will they change? I know a ninety-four-year-old still stuck in her ways.